Short shorts and stake knives
It was just before new years and there were a lot of costume parties going on so when we had guy come in and ask about short german costumes for guys I didn't think anything of it.
The guy comes back up in just the short shorts with suspenders I am helping another person so the other girl helps him figure out the straps. She seams kind of creeped out but I don't know why because my back was turned. I asked her after he took another costume back. She told me his wedding tackle was hanging out of the shorts. I wanted to kick him out but she said she didn't think it was on purpose.
He took forever in the dressing room and when I ask him if everything was ok he come out in a black trench coat and flashed both of us. I proceed to throw his nasty behind out of the store, call the cops and then get to check to make sure whatever was left in the dressing room wasn't covered in crazy man baby batter.(luckily it wasn't)
When I used the claw to pick up what was left behind a long black stake knife fell out of the pile. I have no idea what he was planning but I hid behind the counter until the cops came.
Showing posts with label work stories. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work stories. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Monday, July 20, 2009
Tales from work (may be NSFW)
The most embarrassing phone call ever
It was a busy afternoon and we were gearing up for a festival later that evening. The phone had been ringing off the hook and we were starving by the time lunch made it to us so when the phone rang I took the call so the other girl could eat.
I went through my greeting and the guy on the other end of the line returned it. He sounded like one of the older gentlemen that had been calling about civil war outfits all week. I asked him why he was calling. He asked if we carried fake sperm. He said it in the same tone of voice I would use to order a hamburger at a fast food joint no hints of heavy breathing or the snickering in the background I would expect from a prank. I paused for a moment, surely I must of misunderstood so I asked him to repeat what he had just said and he said. "I am looking for some fake sperm."
I lost the ability to speak for a moment but trying to be a professional I told him we had lquid latex and that might work. There was silence on the end of the line and then he said. "Aww. Are you sure you don't have any pre-made big, fake wads of cum?" I somehow managed to keep my composure and tell him to call one of the local adult shops and hung up as quick as I could. The other girl asked what happened because my face had apparently frozen in a rather odd grimace. I told her and she asked why I didn't find out what he needed the sperm for. I couldn't ask because I was afraid of what he might of said but I regret it now.
It was a busy afternoon and we were gearing up for a festival later that evening. The phone had been ringing off the hook and we were starving by the time lunch made it to us so when the phone rang I took the call so the other girl could eat.
I went through my greeting and the guy on the other end of the line returned it. He sounded like one of the older gentlemen that had been calling about civil war outfits all week. I asked him why he was calling. He asked if we carried fake sperm. He said it in the same tone of voice I would use to order a hamburger at a fast food joint no hints of heavy breathing or the snickering in the background I would expect from a prank. I paused for a moment, surely I must of misunderstood so I asked him to repeat what he had just said and he said. "I am looking for some fake sperm."
I lost the ability to speak for a moment but trying to be a professional I told him we had lquid latex and that might work. There was silence on the end of the line and then he said. "Aww. Are you sure you don't have any pre-made big, fake wads of cum?" I somehow managed to keep my composure and tell him to call one of the local adult shops and hung up as quick as I could. The other girl asked what happened because my face had apparently frozen in a rather odd grimace. I told her and she asked why I didn't find out what he needed the sperm for. I couldn't ask because I was afraid of what he might of said but I regret it now.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Tales from work
Whispering clown woman
It was a average slow summer morning at the shop I was working on a pile of repairs. A woman comes in and asks in a tiny whisper about our clown costumes. Now we do get people in who act like picking out a costume is something dirty or to be ashamed of I don't understand why but I help them cheerfully just the same.
So I show her what we have in stock and she picks a few things and all the wile she is asking me all most inaudible questions. "Is this good for a clown? Is this clown-like? Are you sure this is for a clown? will this make a good clown?"
She repeats these questions for every clown related thing on the rack. Finally after trying everything in the section on she narrows it down to two outfits. She spends the next hour trying them on over and over again wile waffling between them. Every time I try to answer the phone or get back to patching things she comes and stands near me stareing until I am done and then starts her litany of questions over again.
Unable to decided between them she comes over to the wigs and repeats these questions "Is this good for a clown? Is this clown-like? Are you sure this is for a clown? will this make a good clown?" for almost every female wig we have in stock last time I counted there were about 30 to 35 of them. Then she wanders off to obsessively try on the same two outfits again and I put all the wigs back in their places. She comes back and tries them all on again wile switching outfits between wigs.
By the time she is done she has spent almost three hours of my four hour shift repeating the same questions over and over in a tiny voice I have to straining my ears to understand and clinging to me like a leach. I don't think I have ever been so happy to see some one leave.
It was a average slow summer morning at the shop I was working on a pile of repairs. A woman comes in and asks in a tiny whisper about our clown costumes. Now we do get people in who act like picking out a costume is something dirty or to be ashamed of I don't understand why but I help them cheerfully just the same.
So I show her what we have in stock and she picks a few things and all the wile she is asking me all most inaudible questions. "Is this good for a clown? Is this clown-like? Are you sure this is for a clown? will this make a good clown?"
She repeats these questions for every clown related thing on the rack. Finally after trying everything in the section on she narrows it down to two outfits. She spends the next hour trying them on over and over again wile waffling between them. Every time I try to answer the phone or get back to patching things she comes and stands near me stareing until I am done and then starts her litany of questions over again.
Unable to decided between them she comes over to the wigs and repeats these questions "Is this good for a clown? Is this clown-like? Are you sure this is for a clown? will this make a good clown?" for almost every female wig we have in stock last time I counted there were about 30 to 35 of them. Then she wanders off to obsessively try on the same two outfits again and I put all the wigs back in their places. She comes back and tries them all on again wile switching outfits between wigs.
By the time she is done she has spent almost three hours of my four hour shift repeating the same questions over and over in a tiny voice I have to straining my ears to understand and clinging to me like a leach. I don't think I have ever been so happy to see some one leave.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)